1: Be yourself.
The most important rule of life is to simply be yourself. No matter what any one else thinks of you, or says to you, no one can affect you, if you remain true to yourself. Listen to your heart and always, no matter what anyone tells you, follow it. It will never lead you in the wrong direction. It will always lead you to the places that are right for you, and only you.
2: Do whatever makes you happy and do it often.
Why spend your time doing things that give you no sense of achievement, worth or pleasure? Find what makes you happy and do that as much as you possibly are able. If you can make that your occupation, so much the better. When you are happy, your heart and mind are open and though their openness, you are more able to perceive opportunities and to read the signs that life is placing before you.
3: Never be envious of another person. Your time will come.
The path is a long one and every person experiences highs and lows at different points along their journey. When you see that someone is experiencing good luck and fortune, be happy for them. If they can find it, then they are the proof that the rewards exist, and it follows that you too can find your own rewards. Persevere and your own time will come to walk in the light.
4: Never live with regrets.
Living in the past is wasted energy. You cannot affect the past, but you can affect the future. If there is something that went wrong, can you make it better now? If yes, then do so. If no, put it behind you and move on. See every lost opportunity as an impetus to make sure it does not happen the next time. And rest assured, there will always be a next time.
5: Learn to forgive others.
Forgiveness is a strength. Those that can forgive the wrong doings of others, are more likely to be positive and happy people. Harbouring ill-thought,negativity and malice towards others is maintaining a negative energy within yourself, which will ultimately become detrimental to both your mental and physical well-being. Better to let go, to forgive and to move on.
6: Learn to forgive yourself.
Perhaps more important than forgiving others, is the need to forgive yourself. Everyone makes mistakes. Every person has their own unique set of flaws. Come to terms with who you are, what you have done, the errors that you may have made and then learn to see yourself as the beautiful creation that you are.
7: Never stop striving to reach your dreams.
No matter how hard the path gets, never stop believing and never stop striving towards your dreams. Walking the path is an equally important part of life as the attain of what it is that we seek. Along our path, we learn many important lessons that will shape us and help us towards our goals. The moment that you give up on your dreams, you also lose the opportunity to learn the lessons that you need to learn in order to evolve your spirit to its ultimate point in this life. Dreams are achievable. Keep walking the path because all the time that you do so, the path is illuminated with your light. And that is a wonderful thing.
_________________________
4 Rules adhered to. Only 3 to go. :) (can you guess?) Why don't I dedicate some time this weekend to those three? Not a bad idea...
ReplyDeleteOne of the three has been on my agenda very very intensely for a while now. I googled wikihow on how to deal with it and it's helped :) (What a crappy 21st century substitution to going to the pub with a dear friend to get drunk together and discuss... Init? :)
I meditated over these points at the weekend. What I find difficult with point 4-5-6 is that I can brainwash myself into these thoughts and I usually make an effort to do so, to consciously try to think positive things about what I consider to be my wrong-doings and other people's wrong-doings. But it is usually a very very lengthy process before the positive thought replaces the negative without the effort. In other words, before forgiveness becomes honest. Any tips on reducing the stewing time?
ReplyDeleteD, I never thought about how I learned forgiveness, I think it was always something that was in me, because I have a soft heart, I have compassion and empathy. Perhaps that was learned subconsciously, perhaps it is what I was blessed with in the moment of my making. What I do know, is that when something significant happens in my life, when I have suffered the anguish of losing love, I find something else in which to lose myself. In my past, that has been a new life in Budapest and scuba diving. By immersing my soul into a new place or a new activity, I stop thinking about what was, what might have been, what I have lost, and my focus becomes on what I am doing now, what I am learning. I fill the void that has been left and in the process of doing so, I let all of the negativity sit in the back of my mind. Gone for the time, but never forgotten. At some point down the line, there comes a moment when it feels right to revisit it and to confront it. And I do. Then I am more able to see that not everything happens because of me and I am more able to see things from the other person's perspective. I try to see how it would have been for them and try to see what was happening with that person. It allows me to understand that there was no agenda, no malice, no evil at work, only two people, each with their own needs and wants, trying to figure things out. With time and hindsight, it is also possible to see the errors that I made, the misjudgements, and the wrong decisions. And here is the most important thing: it allows me to see the lessons and to learn from them, and why it had to occur in order to take me forward in life, into and onto the next chapter.
ReplyDeleteThere is no answer to reduced the stewing time other than to put it away for a time and focus on the positives in your life. If there are no positives, if there is nothing that gives you a sense of purpose and of meaning, then you need to change that. If you have nothing that gives you moments of joy in each and every day, then make a change, because without the joy, there is only pain and suffering and stewing. You have to move forward because the path only goes forwards.
I feel that so much negativity and regret remains with people simply because they do not fill the void with something more meaningful to their lives. I was lucky in that certain opportunities presented themselves to me at the critical times. I knew that I needed something to take me away from the situation I was in. Those opportunities exist and are out there for every person. The trick is to see them and take them and to understand that those are needed. If you do not do this, then you continue in the old life, the same life, except only now, it has added negativity.
Don't surround yourself with negativity. Don't try to maintain the same life. Seek out something new, something that has meaning for you and latch onto it. Ride that train for a time, put some distance between yourself and the negative situation and at some point, when you look back down the track, you'll see that actually it was all necessary, that there was nothing else that could have been done, and that you now recognise why you did what you did. Acknowledge your errors, faults, mistakes and poor decisions and try to understand why you made them. Then and only then, can you forgive yourself, forgive others and live with no regrets.
Life brings to us every thing that we need, in the moments that we need it. All you have to do is to open your heart to life, to believe and to take hold of the opportunity. It may be the road less travelled, it may be the road that's been trampled until the grass is gone and all that remains are the smooth rounded rocks of countless foot falls, but each is a road that will take you to some place new and onto the next adventure.
Never underestimate the power of female multi-tasking. I'm well capable of complete change of life and total focus on new goals while maintaining the stewing for years. It's not like I'm sitting at home and concentrating on bad things. I get out, I push myself, I restructure my life, I try to achieve things and still, the stewing remains. My mind is an overcooked Gulash :)
ReplyDelete