What Have I Gotten Myself Into?

That's the question that has come to my mind over the last few days.  What have I gotten myself into?  Now I think about it, and I was thinking about it on my walk over here to the cafe, perhaps the question is not so much what, but rather why?  Why have I gotten myself into this situation?  I guess before we could begin to answer the question, it is necessary to define the subject matter.

It's Sunday 29 December.  This means that I am now less than two weeks away from my embarkation on my next adventure.  Thirteen days more and I will once again leave England after yet another short stay, a stay that is either too long or too short - I can never quite decide which - and I'll head off to New Zealand to begin my cycle tour adventure.  In less than three weeks, I should be on the road, spinning those pedals that turn the cranks that turn the wheels, that will speed me along the roads.  Exciting isn't it?  A dream realised.  Surely this is the epitome of what life is all about.  Throwing oneself into the unknown and the challenge of never being sure of what each day will bring.  It does not matter how many times I have done this now, each time the departure date approaches, and for some reason that tick to thirteen days seems to be the event trigger more than any other, I begin to grow concerned, I start to fret about what it is that I am doing, and why I am going to do it.

I believe it is the same for everyone.  No matter what they will tell you, no matter how gung-ho and cock sure they appear to be, I have little doubt that underneath there lies a swirling, tumultuous flow of worry, a constant and raging stream of concerns, that are held in check only by the dam of outer calmness.  Columbus, Cook, Scott, Shackleton, Earhart, Hilary, Armstrong (of the Neil variety), Yeager, Baumgartner and any one else you may wish to include in such exulted company, I can guarantee that although they may have appeared to be the perfect picture of composed, mill pond surface calmness, below that exterior lurked the questions, the fears, the doubts, and the constant nagging of why am I doing this and what have I gotten myself into?

It's only natural.  I know that.  I also know that it is going to be okay.  My own adventure is nothing compared to some, but it is my own adventure, my own decision to step outside of my comfort zone, to go off in exploration and in search, to confront my fears, to extend myself, to find out who I am, to know what mettle lurks under my flesh.  No matter how seemingly small and insignificant your own adventure may appear to some, to the person at the centre of that story, it is the greatest undertaking in the history of humanity.  Imagine for a moment a person who suffers from acute agoraphobia.  To this person, even opening the front door of their house can seem the most daunting decision to take, let alone stepping across the threshold and leaving the secure confines of their home.

Road To Nowhere by Talking Heads has just begun to play on the sound system of cafe.  Is it coincidence that I happen to love this song?  Doesn't road to nowhere sum up my journey, all of our journeys?  We're walking our paths, thinking that we are headed some place special, striving to get to a certain point, mulling over decisions that we believe to be of the utmost importance, but in reality, we're all headed to exactly the same place, no matter what we do, no matter how hard we try.  That may lead you to ask, well then, why bother at all?  And the answer to that my friend is that it is the journey that is the making, it is the space between two places and the manner in which we cross that space that counts.  It is that crossing between points that generates experiences and memories and those are the very things that define us, that change us, that allow us to discover who we are, who we were truly meant to be.  It is the crossing of this distance, no matter how great, no matter how small, that reveals our inner truth and shows us the true path.

Oddly enough, the thought generated by that song has answered the questions hasn't it?  What did I get myself into and why have I gotten myself into it?  Answer: because if I do not, then I will never know my answer.  If I do not, I will never grow my soul.  If I do not, I will never experience the magic that is created when a person goes off in search of adventure and daring.  If I do not, I will reach the end of my days and I will wonder what could have been.  If I do not, I will be left with a regret, knowing full well that I had the means necessary to achieve my dreams and I chose an early death instead.  And why would anyone chose an early death when there is so much life out there, within your grasp, when all you have to do is to stretch out an arm, reach out with your finger tips and grab a hold?  I choose to grasp onto life.  I choose to see the miracles and the magic of a life lived.  And just as Renton said at the end of Trainspotting, "Choose life." Amen Renton, amen.

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A Time For Spirituality

Let's face it, our daily lives tend to be pretty full.  First off, there's that thing called work that most of us have to do.  To get to work, there's the daily commute, which seems to take longer and longer.  Then there's the family.  Looking after the children, if you have them, is another full-time job.  Perhaps there are elderly parents that need your care.  There's the grocery shopping, chores around the house, cooking, the dirty dishes, the lawns that require cutting and the regular maintenance of the garden, the car that needs a wash, household bills and the accounts to be paid.  Then you need to go to the gym, go for a run, play some sports, go to the movies, watch that TV program, visit friends, go to the bar, go to a restaurant.  Perhaps there's a dog to walk. There are a lot of things to take care of and all of them take up our precious time.  Where, in all of this do we find the time to connect with our soul, to sit quietly and talk with our heart?  Are we in danger of losing our spirituality?

For the past week, I have been participating in the 21 Day Meditation Challenge from Oprah and Deepak Chopra.  It has been the process of setting aside a specific amount of time each day, to sit down and to formally meditate, that triggered my thinking about spirituality in a modern society, and the questions of when and how do people find the time to meditate and to reconnect with themselves and the universe?

For me personally, I know that I have meditated throughout my life, albeit, not in a conventional sense.  I have always sought out peace and calm, quiet oases where I could sit and think, and just be me.  Down at the beach watching the waves; in a clearing in the woods amongst the trees; on the top of a hill or mountain, looking down upon the world; under the ocean, listening to the rhythmic sound of my own breathing; sitting quietly inside of a church or cathedral.  Wherever I have been, I have made time for these moments. 

There have been several significant advances in technology during human existence: fire, the wheel, agriculture, the industrial revolution, electricity, telecommunications, the combustion engine, computers and the digital age.  With each step, humanity has moved progressively ever further away from the natural world.  As a race, we are spending increasing amounts of time enclosed within the confines of our self made spaces, whether that be the car, the office, the home, the mall, restaurants, cafes, cinemas, or at the gym.  Then, there is our  immersion in television, music,  movies, the internet, video games, text messaging, and social media.  Human society is becoming ever more closed off from the natural world.  We are shutting ourselves away from nature and moving further away from our natural surroundings, cocooned in a world of concrete, steel, glass, bricks, mortar, and an endless stream of ones and zeros.

This has a detrimental impact on our ability to find moments to commune with our inner selves, that we are no longer finding quiet moments of solace, where we can be one with our natural environment.  Because of this, I believe that as a race, humanity is losing touch with its spiritual self, and with the spiritual world in which we live.   It seems to me that our collective belief is increasingly to see ourselves as separate from the natural world, able to control nature, but we are not separate and neither can we control the elemental force that is nature.  Humanity is as much an integral part of the life on this planet as a tree, a flower, an insect, a fish, or a bird.  Immersing ourselves in nature reconnects our souls with the force of life.  Losing those moments, takes us further from a spiritual path and understanding of life.

I see that there are two fundamental problems in modern society, in regards to finding spirituality.  The first is that our lives have become too busy, and the second is that we are increasingly closing off from the natural world.  I do not believe that either of these can be good for our race.  Something is being lost, something which, although intangible, is nonetheless an essential quality of what it is to be human.  Spirituality is being slowly eroded away.

Take the Sabbath for example.  There was a time in the England, when Sunday was a special day, preserved for prayer and family time, when the shops were not allowed to open, where pubs had restricted hours for the sale of alcohol, when large numbers of people used to attend morning church services, when lunch was a traditional roast dinner involving all of the family.  Now shops are allowed to open and trade, pub opening hours are far less restrictive, church attendances have long been in steady decline, and the traditional Sunday roast?  Well, in my family at least, that was lost long ago.  Where the Sabbath was once preserved as a day of thought, reflection and prayer, and for family time, it has been steadily reduced to just another day of the week, no longer as sacred, no longer set aside as a special day, and many people are now required to work.  It is just another sign of our increasing loss of spirituality in society.  A further distancing from our spiritual needs.

I am very fortunate.  My current work as a scuba diving instructor means I am usually out on the ocean, or immersed under it.  The very nature of my work allows me the time to connect with nature.  When I exchanged my corporate life in the UK for an alternative lifestyle, there was a big part of me that wished to find this very connection.  Now, living in Costa Rica, it is impossible not to connect with my natural surroundings.  As I do not own a car, I either cycle or walk to all local places, which allows me the time to look around, to think, to see, to feel.  When I am outside, I never listen to an iPod or other music player, I prefer instead, to listen to the pulse of nature.  I choose to hear the songs of the birds as they call and whistle one another.  I like to listen to the waves as they break on the shore.  I smile whenever I hear the calls of the monkeys that are hiding up in the foliage of the trees, somewhere in the jungle.  These are the natural rhythms of life, they help me to stay connected to nature.  They have helped me to become more spiritually aware.

Since I left the corporate world, it has been my immersion into the natural world that has truly opened my heart, so that I now see truly.  I have learned to see the miracles of life that surround us, that occur every single moment.  Everything that I have learned and now express in this blog, has been learned as a direct result of walking my one true path.  Perhaps I was always this way inclined, someone once told me that I was spiritual even before my life change.  I have always followed my heart, so I guess this is true.  But now, by choosing to be surrounded by the natural world, I have found a far greater insight and awareness of myself.

Don't lose your spirituality.  Find yourself a quiet moment to stop and reflect.  Take time to get outside, into a park, to go and walk in the woods or along the beach.  Stare up to the sky and watch the clouds roll by, see the rays of sunlight, gaze at the stars and the moon.  Unplug yourself and listen to the world.  Let your thoughts drift.  Slowly and surely, you will begin to recover your soul, you will begin to regain your spiritual self, and through this, will come self awareness, and you will open your heart and see the miracles that exist in every single moment.  Life is simplicity.  Peel away the layers and finally be your true and natural self.

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Today I Am Open To The Presence Of Miracles

Today, I am commencing the 21 Day Meditation Challenge from Oprah and Chopra Deepak.  In fact, I am starting this challenge with a dear friend and kindred spirit, and it was this friend who invited me to join her on this particular journey.  The purpose of day one is entitled, Miraculous Journey, with the objective being to begin to open yourself to the presence of the miracles that surround us each moment of every day.  Those of you who have been following my blog, will already know that I talk about this, and that I see it as just one of the amazing and enriching by-products of following your heart.  Today, as I sat down to meditate, with the intent of being open to miracles, something extraordinary happened.

Most evenings, when the working day is completed, if I have time, I like to cycle down to the beach at Playa Flamingo, and to watch the sun, as it sets slowly over the Pacific Ocean.  It is always a beautiful sight, and I love the quiet calm that transcends over all of those who are watching.  It is a time for thought, for reflection on the day, and for thinking about what tomorrow will bring.  It brings peace and tranquility to all life.

This evening, I sat on the sand watching, and it occurred to me that right then, in the glow of the evening sun, was the perfect time to meditate, to open my heart, and to think of the miracles of life.  I looked at the sun, as it dropped below the line of clouds that stretched across the horizon, changing the grey to hues of purple, mauve, and orange.  I saw that the clouds were lined with a brilliant shine, reminding me that every cloud really does have a silver lining.  I looked at the rippled surface of the ocean, and I saw the reflective glow of the sun, as the water shimmered with the breeze, giving the illusion that the ocean was on fire.  My eyes fixed on the volcanic rock formations that line the coast of Flamingo, and then further out, I looked upon the Santa Catalina Islands.  I turned and looked at the land, at the rocky headland, covered with a sea of green, all the trees carrying the lush foilage of the wet season.  I watched as the waves broke on the beach, their waters racing up the sand, reaching out as far as possible, clawing their way over the grains, until they could hold on no longer, and could only fall away and recede once more.  I saw people on the beach, playing, watching, taking photographs, laughing, smiling, talking, sharing.  A flicker of movement and my eyes glanced down to my left, to fix on a small shell on the dry sand.  And as I watched, that shell turned itself into a crab, that scurried forwards, then stopped, and abruptly became only a shell once more.  Then, in a flash, it transformed, it ran and had become a crab again.  I followed its path and my eyes saw that there was not just one crab, there were many, all intent on their end of day business,  every one of them hiding down at the slightest movement, the lightest tremor, to become simple shells again.  And in this moment, I smiled to myself.  I smiled because I understood and I knew.

I knew that I already could see the miracles that surround us each and every moment.  I smiled because my heart knew the truth of it, and my heart, in that moment, felt at peace, and it felt happy.  It was grateful that I was there, that I dared to dream, and that I had the courage to reach out for that dream.  In this moment, my heart was open.  In this moment, I was surrounded by life, by love, and by the countless millions, the infinite billions of precious miracles.  I absorbed all of this in a single instant of time, I took it all in and I let it flood into my heart. And, during this blink of an eye, because my heart was open, I let love flow out from me.  I let the energy of the universe out, so that I could keep the balance within.  I released my light, and in that single moment, I was brighter than the sun, I shone more brilliantly than the greatest star in all the universe.

Afterward, I felt an urge to create and so I scribed some words into the sand.

I saw life and it was good

I opened my heart to the miracles

That surround us each and every moment

Let your light shine forth

Because that light is pure love.

~ ~ ~

I do not know what day two of the 21 Day Meditation Challenge will bring to me.  Perhaps it will be a new lesson.  Perhaps it will be an old lesson.  Some how, of my own volition and experiences, I have moved along the path towards the light.  I have become spiritually enlightened, without trying to do so.  I did not read any books to learn what I know.  Rather, I opened my heart to possibility, I opened my heart to my dreams, and I took a chance on life. 

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Mantra Ray

A friend and I, are undertaking the Chopra Center 21 day meditation challenge  which begins today.  To her absolute horror and astonishment, losing all faith in mankind in the process, she discovered that there was no such thing on the internet (I confirmed this via Google myself) as a mantra ray.  This is clearly a clever litte play on words, involving a manta ray and a mantra as used in meditation.

To restore all sense and order to the universe, and to restore my friend's faith in humanity, which was so shockingly disturbed, I have remedied this situation, with my very own creation.


Cartoon manta ray courtesy of http://darwin.wcupa.edu/~biology/fish/cartoons

  
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