Wednesday 12 September 2012

Waiting For The Train

Often in life, we find ourselves waiting.  Waiting for the right moment, the right set of circumstances, waiting for something to happen, waiting for something to come along.  Our hearts call to us, they show us the way, but still we sit and we wait, not heeding their call, hearing the voice inside but not listening to the words that it has to say.  I know this because I can remember it happening to me.  Many times, I can vividly recall having a feeling inside so strong it almost overwhelmed me.  A voice called to me, urging me to take up arms, telling me I must take action.  To go, to do, to see.  But I waited.


Rather than taking a positive action to do or to try something and find out a definitive answer to a question, sometimes we prefer not to know, we prefer to keep our dreams alive inside our minds, to maintain our hopes for what could be, for might might be.  The thought of losing the dream roots our feet so deeply in the ground that we become paralysed, unable to move.  And the longer we wait before taking action, the more we think about the thing, the more we analyse all possible outcomes and eventualities, the deeper our feet sink, the more stuck we become.  The head takes over and the voice of our heart is drowned out by all the noise and interference from the thoughts that are swirling around in the mind.  The result: Nothing. Inaction. Waiting.

Why?

Perhaps it is the thought that the reality will never live up to the dream.  Maybe it's because it is just not possible to see where the path will lead.  The picture perfect vision of how the future will look, how everything will happen, that you have created in your imagination, is too precious to dispel.  Fear plays its part too.  (Please see my post on fear at: http://talesofalchemy.blogspot.ca/2012/08/what-is-there-to-fear.html ) And perhaps it is because we always believe that there is more time, there will be other opportunities.

The only way to discover where the path will lead, is to walk it and go and find out.  That perfect picture that has been created in the mind is nothing more than the most simple of line drawings when compared to the beauty of the reality.  The reality has a richness and a depth that cannot possibly be comprehended in the mind.  How can you create a picture of infinity in your head?  The reality has possibilities that cannot be imagined, that cannot be fathomed.  There are paths that will lead you in different directions.  There are people to meet, places to see and adventures waiting.  There are possibilities that will never exist until you take that first step.

This is a short story I wrote to illustrate my points.  It is loosely based on an experience I had, but rather than just telling you my story, I am going to leave you with Tomas' story instead.


Tomas And The Girl With The Golden Hair
Tomas liked Sabina.  He had liked her ever since he had been walking to work one May morning, and he had caught sight of the sun reflecting off her golden hair.  In his mind, he could still see it as though it had happened only a moment before.  But it was now four months later, the leaves that had been fresh, soft and green were now either yellow, red or brown and if they were no longer on the trees, then they were laying crisp on the ground.  Summer had passed, but there remained a golden fire that burned in the heart of Tomas whenever he thought of Sabina.

The ending of summer was always marked by the occasion of the harvest dance, that took place every year in the square at the centre of the village.  It had been tradition for as long as memory served and was written in the Book of the Ancients, kept by the village Elder.  It was a time when the people gave thanks for the reaping of the harvest and it was a time to celebrate the ending of another summer and for the villagers to enjoy themselves before the coming of another harsh, cold winter.  As described in the Book, the dance always took place on the day of the second equinox.  All the preparations were complete, the square had been made ready and all that was now required were the people, the drink, the food, the celebrations and the dancing.

Tomas woke early on the day of the dance, feeling excited and nervous.  The day had finally arrived when he was going to ask Sabina to dance with him.  Everything had been thought through and planned.  He would walk over to where she was sitting, look down at her and smile, then he would say, "Hello Sabina, would you care to take this first dance with me?", and he would put out his hand so that she could take his, so that he could escort her to the centre of the square.  She would blush a little, then she would look up to him, look into his eyes with those beautiful green eyes of hers and she would say yes.  They would walk to the centre of the square, he leading her gently, the musicians would strike up the beat and the melody of the traditional first dance and then they would lose themselves in the rhythm and in each other.  Tomas had it all worked out in his head.  It would be a perfect day.

The first chime had sounded and everyone was now assembled in the square.  The Elder, seated in a well worn and ornately carved high backed chair, looked to the sun in the sky, before his eyes fell to the Marker Post.  He noted the length of the shadow, then he nodded his head, once, twice, before lifting his left arm.  With arm raised, he looked around the square, seeing the faces of the expectant crowd, each and every one of whom he knew personally.  Then he let his arm drop.  There was a chime, then another, then another.  Three chimes marked the commencement of proceedings.  The celebration was under way.  It was time for the men and boys of the village to find partners for the first dance.  They had only until the bell chimed again three more times, after that, the music would start and the dance would begin.  It broke all the writings in the Book to find your partner and begin the first dance after the chimes.  It was never done.

Tomas, heart bounding in his chest, looked to where he knew Sabina was seated.  As he knew she would be, she was seated with her family, each of her younger sisters on either side.  Katrine, the next eldest after Sabina would dance for the first time this year, but Tilde, was still too young and could only look on.  Tomas started to walk across to where Sabina sat.  The bell chimed the first chime.  All of his hopes and dreams rested on these next few moments.  Everything that he had imagined over and over again in his mind was about to come to fruition.  But then he stopped.  A thought came unbidden to his mind.  What if she said no?  It had never occurred to him before that she could say no.  That she could turn him down and leave him standing there in embarrassment.  To suffer the indignity of walking away alone, rather than together towards the centre of the square.  All of his dreams, all of the thinking how it was going to be!  Tomas stood rooted to the spot.  The bell chimed for the second time.  His heart urged him to move, to continue to walk but his head shouted loudest.  Sabina remained, seated, waiting for a partner.  Tomas, plagued by doubt and fear continued to hesitate.  And in those moments of hesitation, before the third chime of the bell, Christophe, the son of the thatcher, walked towards Sabina and put out his hand.  She rose to her feet, glanced briefly in the direction where Tomas was standing and then walked hand in hand to the centre of the square with Christophe.  The bell chimed a third and last time.  Tomas had lost his chance.  The opportunity was gone, never to be recovered.  He would never know whether she would have danced with him, he would never know the feel of her hand in his, nor the delight and the pleasure of dancing with the girl with the golden hair.  But at least he could still hold on to his hopes and his dreams.

The End


You can spend your entire life waiting for the right moment.  You can hesitate for too long, just like Tomas, just like I did, and lose the chances that are placed along the road for you.  There will never be a perfect time because the perfect time only manifests itself the moment you lift your foot and place it down ahead of you.  In that moment, you will discover that the time was right, that everything is right.  Don't wait.  Don't hesitate.  Seize the moment, seize the day, and walk.

It is my experience that the reality is far more amazing and beautiful than I could ever have imagined.  And so I say this:-

Go suck that marrow out of life and see just how far you can ride the train.

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